Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Stalking the Elusive Day Off

Go me, for the first time in nearly three years, I slept through the alarm long enough to make my daughter late for school. I called the school, fed my firstborn breakfast, and headed out the door, but not before feeding my son and changing his diaper so my hubby could relax before work. While I was out I got dh a cocoa so he wouldn't be annoyed about me sleeping through the alarm(well he didnt really blame me I was working til eleven last night). I was with my friend Lisa and she suggested we go to the local car wash and use the change machine to get laundry money. After looking around to see if the change police were around, I got my ten dollars worth of quarters. I then went home and fixed bacon and eggs for my husband .I am now thinking about the laundry and vacuuming and cooking I will do today. Welcome to Wednesday, my day off.

When you are married , or a parent, or in my case both, a day off is an elusive prize that never seems quite within reach. Day off what is that? To me a day off is defined as a day where one can do whatever the hell he or she feels like. I was really thinking what the perfect day for me would be.This is my selfish wish list....this is my dream.I will assume my children are away at nanas. Just for one day. My children are my world and are amazing. Right now, I m remembering my son taking off his diaper and spreading shit all over the crib, so I think Im allowed a small little dream.

1. I wake up at about 830 to my husband, who is incidentally fucking hot, nibbling on my ear and wanting hot monkey love.

2. I go into the shower with husband where we have hot monkey love again.

3. I know this is a dream, but hubby doesnt cook except for grilling and making pizza with Boboli crust so we head down to the diner for breakfast.

4. We then take the train in to Boston for the day. For some reason because this is my dream rememer it is not raining. Also, I am wearing comfortable yet adorable shoes and not boots with two inch heels that get caught in every puddle, and long pants that get soaked in the rain .And for some inexplicable reason, I have remembered to bring an umbrella, just in case.

5. After we spend a wonderful day sightseeing and eating great food and hubby buys me a couple of nice things, we head home after our wonderful day off. Then more hot monkey love.

Its my anniversary next month, and maybe who knows I could get my wish. But I also know that if I had to choose between my family and all the true "days off" in the world, I could never give up watching my daughter grow up into a wonderful young lady who befriends all the shy new kids at school, or watch my son applaud while Im feeding him lunch. (He's one ok?)And my husband is a pain in the ass sometimes, but he is still pretty hot after eleven years.And he does still make me laugh.

So days off are nice, but if I had too many of them I think I would grow tired of all the freedom. I love my family, and I love taking care of them. It's not for everyone, but It's alright with me. I just have to keep remembering to count my blessings, and they are numerous.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Why Can't I just Enjoy the Show?

I love movies. If I didn't have children I would go much more often. I am truly looking forward to the "Where the Wild Things" are movie more than my own seven year old daughter who had destroyed our copy by the time she was four. Seriously,by the time she lost interest, I was making shit up about the story to keep the story fresh. "See that big monster in the middle honey?"I would ask her, "That's Bob hes the dentist for the whole group, and those two big ones with the fangs, they are Larry and Barry and they are twin brothers." .God knows what I would have come up with had her interest in the story extended another two or three years.

I usually can sit back and relax and enjoy whatever movie or tv show I am watching, and yes I realize it is called suspension of disbelief, but sometimes, I see things that annoy me or little patterns in movies of the same genre that kind of annoy me. Here are just a few.

1. What' s with all the black leather in spy movies and on tv shows like "Alias?" Ok, I know its been addressed in "Jay and Silent Bob Strikes Back", and I completely agree with Kevin Smith. There are so many reasons not to wear vinyl or leather to go on a super secret spy mission. In my vinyl pant wearing days, sure they looked great, but the fact remains, is they get hot and make crinkly noises when they walk.

2. You know what's cool? A badass! You know whats annoying as all hell? Someone who knows they are a badass.

3. I love alot of shows that have uber cool tech support. I get annoyed when I see characters that think they are so smart that they become god like in their infallibility. Yeah, I am talking to you Topher on "Dollhouse" I much prefer Marshall on "Alias" who always seemed surprised by how smart he was.

4. I wasn't going to say it but I really hate the bunches of movies out that have the same plot of a desperate woman who needs a man but can't find one. Ok Heather Locklear, I truly believe that you can't find a man and you are really struggling. Really?You can't find a date?Debra Messing you can't find yourself a date? Wow hot women with millions of dollars are just like me! Oh Im sorry, they are playing a character, but no matter how much to put the ponytail and glasses on hot actresses, they are still hot actresses.

I know I will think of other things, but for now duty calls. Perhaps if you are lucky, I will share more of my wisdom(mindless rants) soon.

Monday, October 5, 2009

Hello Im over Thirty and I Play Video Games

I love video games. The fact is at my house we have just about every system available at our disposal. Well the fact is our Psp yellow lighted and it works kinda sporadically. And Ill give you a tip about that towel trick with the 360. If you do it and your system fails, it will fuck it up worse than ever.

Some people freak out when I tell them this and assume I am either mentally deficient or weird in some way. Well, I can't really do anything to defend the weird accusations, but I like to think that I am fairly smart when I've had my 8 (ok really usually more like 5) hours.

I don't smoke, I don't drink(much) and I'm not gambling away my Life's savings, ($4.50)so what's the harm. Its a little escape for me. I like ds and Wii the best, but Im pretty good at Hotshots golf. I dont like to shoot at people , but I love to build cities and rescue the fair princess. I was a little miffed that Fable II had guns? What century are we in people? Well I guess, it doesn't really say.

I used to kind of keep it to myself, but now I will say unashamed that Im over thirty and I play video games. I like rpgs, mmos(like I have the time) and I love me a good puzzle and thats ok in moderation. It helps me get away from other stresses in my life. I say a little gaming after the kid's go to bed is a good thing. I hope to write more on this subject. Next up on my Blog:Hello Im over Thirty and I still Watch "Buffy"

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Be Happy Puppy Dogs and Rainbow Stickers

Someone has informed me to not be angry and to be happy. Isnt that the point of a blog to express your frustrations with the world.?Well fine here is a list of things that make me

1. Puppy dogs and rainbow stickers. No I am not kidding shut up.

2. My daughter who is actually turning out to be a decent kid.

3. My son saying hi and waving to me.

4. Friends

5. Making other people laugh.

6. Watching the Princess Bride which in my opinion is the greatest movie ever made.

7. Video games

8. Chocolate.

More to follow. Be gentle people Im just learning ok?

Little Things That Piss Me Off About Parking Lots

Wow creating a blog was something I always wanted to do,but always felt it was really out of myleague. I don't hang out in coffee shops with my laptop feeling the need for people to watch me as I write, I'm not some sort super hero mom who works three part time jobs and attends dental school while raising five kids, who would care about what I had to say? Then I realized, why do I really give a fuck? If you want to read what I have to say read it, no big deal.
Maybe some of my followers would want to read my blog if they were really bored, couldn't sleep, or there were no good magazines in the bathroom. Hey it could happen. Ok so maybe I do want people to read this.Maybe a little. Maybe it's a test. See if I care.
I just wanted to share a little bit about myself. Most people know Im married and have two kids, and I work a job in retail Im not particularly psyched about especially since most of the managers were in third grade when I started in this field. That's a little thing that pisses me off, but I shouldn't let it get to me. It's a job right? Well on to the title of this little piece and here I just a short list of things that piss me off about parking lots.

1. People that leave shopping carts out in the parking lot when there is a shopping cart corral literally FIVE FEET AWAY!!!!! You wonder why over fifty percent of Americans are obese, and you cant walk a few feet to put your car away. Do you honestly leave the lot praying someone's fucking car gets dented oh please oh please? Maybe you are one twisted SOB whos gonna fucking twitpic it after?Ugh glad to get that off my chest.

2. Another parking lot thing. Why do you keep circling the lot when there are clearly spaces available further down the lot?Whats even worse is when there is a spot open and they wait for one that is like 10 feet closer? You are wasting gas! So you are hurting the environment, causing damage to your car, and being lazy! Good job dumbass!

3. Rain is not going to cause you to melt unless you are a witch or made entirely of sugar. Yes I realize pedestrians have the right of way, but if it is raining there really is no need to pull your coat over your head so you look like some sort of headless freak then run around like a chicken with your head cut off. Newsflash hun, it is rain. It is made of water. Running around superfast in front of moving vehicles is not going to make you less wet.

Well, this blog thing is pretty new to me, so Id appreciate any of your imput. Positive feedback is great, but so is negative because you took the time to read it anyways! Noone is perfect,but thats what makes us human. It feels good to get things off my chest. Looking forward to hearing from ya.