Thursday, May 6, 2010

Does It help?

When I tell people I'm a morning person, that does not mean I am a three o'clock in the morning person. Having a ninteen month old son means sometimes I have to be. My husband is a kind of wake up at nine or ten in the morning person generally if he had his choice, so typically it is my job to wake up with baby even if I have worked until 11:30 pm at night the night before.

I'll admit I am a bit of a complainer when it comes to this. I've tried asking nicely, and when that doesn't work I turn sarcastic. Call me old fashioned, but it would be nice for him to fix a sippy cup and me to rest once in awhile. It's also my job to get the daughter up and dressed for school in the morning, and generally I help her with homework assignments and lunch money etc. etc., well you get the picture.

I'll admit this makes me grumpy sometimes. I stomp through the apartment at times muttering under my breath, but honestly does it really help? It just pisses my husband off.
what do I think I'm accomplishing? What do I expect? Do I really expect him to immediately rise from the bed take care of everything then fix me a balanced and nutritious breakfast?

This morning I made a conscious choice to not complain. When the baby started crying, I simply made the conscious choice to rise up from the bed, put on my clothing and take care of what needed to be done. I did not raise my voice or run around like a madwoman. Something weird happened. Weird and totally awesome that is!

My daughter got off to school, my son got his diaper change and breakfast, and my husband is now offering to go pick up breakfast! So that is my baby goal for the day. I am going to try and not complain about anything for twenty four hours. Does it help?

I'm not saying be a doormat. I am not saying that if you are dissatified with something not to speak up in a constructive way, I'm just saying in my current situation, what I've been doing isn't working. If complaining a hundred other times didn't work, why would it help today?

In her book "God Never Blinks" author Regina Brett tells the story of a friend who doesn't use the words "have to" in his sentences. He uses the words "get to". I get to do alot of things others don't. I have my health and I can walk, move, breathe, sing, dance,talk, or do any number of things others can't. I need to be grateful and do things in life that actually help my situation.

1 comment:

  1. I made the conscious choice to not have two full-time jobs, about 20 years ago, and left my 3-11pm RN job to stay home with the kids. It was the best "conscious choice" I ever made.

    Nobody should have to work two full-time jobs... one outside the home & one inside the home. Of course we're cranky when we're working that much. Who wouldn't be?

    Don't be too hard on yourself. There's got to be a balance between work & rest. If there's not, the whole world doesn't spin properly on its axis.

    Take care~ Andrea